17.3.18

Ingabe Wethembeke Kubani?

        Usuku ngalunye eniluphilayo nenidlula kulo njengamanje lubucayi futhi lubaluleke kakhulu esiphethweni senu kanye nasekusaseni lenu, ngakho kumele nikwazise konke eninakho ngawo wonke umzuzu odlulayo. Kumele nisisebenzise kahle isikhathi senu ukuze nizinike inzuzo enkulu, ukuze ningayiphileli ize le mpilo. 
Mhlawumbe nizizwa ninokudideka ukuthi kungani ngikhuluma lamazwi. Ngokweqiniso, angithokozile ngezenzo zenu nonke. Ngokuba amathemba ebenginawo ngani awakona lokhu eniyikho njengamanje kuphela. Ngakho, ngingakuveza ngale ndlela: Nina nonke nisengcupheni yokungena engozini. Ukukhalela kwenu insindiso kwakudala kanye nokulangazelela okudlulile kokuphishekela iqiniso kanye nokufuna ukukhanya sekufike ekupheleni. Yile ndlela eningibonga ngayo ekugcineni, okuyinto engingakaze ngiyilangazelele. Angifisi ukukhuluma okuphambene neqiniso, ngokuba ningidumaze kakhulu. Mhlawumbe anifisi ukushiya udaba lusele kanjalo futhi anifisi ukubhekana neqiniso, nokho kumele nginibuze lombuzo ngokuzithoba: Kuyo yonke leminyaka, yini egcwele ezinhliziyweni zenu? Izinhliziyo zenu zithembeke kubani? Ningasho ukuthi umbuzo Wami uze ningalindele, futhi ningangibuzi Mina ukuthi kungani ngibuza umbuzo onjena. Kumele nikwazi lokhu: Kungenxa yokuthi Mina nginazi kahle kakhulu, ngiyaninakekela kakhulu, futhi nginikela kakhulu inhliziyo Yami kulokhu enikwenzayo, yingakho nginibuza ngokuphindelela futhi ngibekezelela ubunzima obungachazeki. Nokho-ke, ngibongwa ngokunganakwa kanye nokushiywa okungabekezeleleki. Ninokudembesela okukhulu mayelana Nami; bekungenzeka kanjani ukuba ngingazi lutho ngakho? Uma nikholwa ukuthi lokhu kungenzeka, kuyaqhubeka nokufakazela ukuthi ngempela aningiphathi ngomusa. Ngokunjalo ngiyanitshela ukuthi niyazikhohlisa. Nina nonke nihlakaniphe ngale ndlela yokuthi anazi ukuthi nenzani; ngakho-ke yini enizoyisebenzisa ukuziphendulela Kimi?

        Umbuzo engikhathazekile ngawo Mina ukuthi izinhliziyo zenu zithembeke kubani. Ngifisa ukuba yilowo nalowo kini ahlele imicabango yakhe bese ezibuza ukuthi ingabe uthembeke kubani futhi uphilela bani. Mhlawumbe, anikaze niwucabangisise lombuzo, ngakho-ke ake nginimbulele impendulo Mina.
     Bonke labo abakhumbulayo bazolivuma leli qiniso: Umuntu uziphilela yena futhi uthembeke kuye. Angikholwa ukuthi impendulo yakho iyiqiniso ngokuphelele, ngokuba nonke niphila izimpilo zenu ngokungafani, ngamunye wenu niyazabalaza ekuhluphekeni kwenu. Ngakho-ke, enethembeke kukho yilabantu enibathandayo kanye nezinto ezinithokozisayo, futhi anethembekanga kinina uqobo ngokupheleleyo. Ngoba ngamunye wenu nithonywe ngabantu, izehlakalo, kanye nezinto ezinizungezile, anithembekanga kinina ngokweqiniso. Ngikhuluma lamazwi hhayi ukuncoma ukuthembeka kwenu kinina, kodwa ukuveza ukuthembeka kwenu kunoma iyiphi into eyodwa. Ngokuba kuyo yonke le minyaka, Mina angikaze ngithole ukuthembeka kukanoma ubani komunye wenu. Ningilandelile Mina yonke le minyaka, kepha anikaze ninginikeze nokuncanyana ukuthembeka kwenu. Kunalokho, nigxile kubantu enibathandayo kanye nezinto ezinithokozisayo, kangangokuthi zisondezwe eduzane nezinhliziyo zenu futhi azisoze zalahlwa, noma ngasiphi isikhathi, noma kuphi. Uma nimagange noma ninentshisekelo noma ngayiphi into eyodwa eniyithandayo, kuhlala njalo kube ngalesi sikhathi enilandela Mina ngaso, noma ngesikhathi nilalele amazwi Ami. Ngakho Mina ngithi, nisebenzisa ukuthembeka engikucela kini, ukuze kunalokho nethembeke futhi nazise “izinto enizithandayo.” Noma ninganikela ngento noma ezimbili Kimi, akumeli uqobo lwenu lonke, futhi akubonisi ukuthi Yimi enithembeke kuye ngokweqiniso. Nizibandakanya nezinto enizithandayo: Abanye bathembeke kumadodana namadodakazi, abanye kubayeni, amakhosikazi, ingcebo, umsebenzi, abaphathi, isikhundla, noma abesifazane. Kulokho enithembeke kukho, anikaze nizizwe nikhathele noma nicasukile; kunalokho, niyakhula ekulangazeleleni ukuba nibe nokuningi kanye nezinto ezisezingeni elihle kulokhu enithembeke kukho, futhi anikaze niphelelwe yithemba. Mina kanye namazwi Ami sihlala siphushelwa ekugcineni ngokwezinto enizishisekelayo. Futhi awunako okunye ongakwenza ngaphandle kokuba ukubeke ekugcineni; abanye indawo esekugcineni bayishiyela ukwethembeka ezintweni abasazozithola abangazazi. Alikho inani abake bangibekela lona Mina ezinhliziyweni zabo. Mhlawumbe ucabanga ukuthi Mina ngicela okuningi kakhulu kuwe noma ngikubeka icala ngokungafanele, kodwa wake wakucabanga lokhu ukuthi ngesikhathi uchitha isikhathi nomndeni wakho ngentokozo, awukaze uthembeke Kimi? Ngezikhathi ezifana nalezi, akukuzwisi yini ubuhlungu? Ngesikhathi izinhliziyo zenu zigcwele injabulo nithola umholo ngemisebenzi yenu, anizizwa nidumele ngokuthi anizinikezanga iqiniso elanele? Yinini lapho wake wakhaliswa khona ukuthi awuyitholanga imvume Yami? Nihlupha izingqondo zenu ngamadodana kanye namadodakazi enu, kepha anikaneliseki, nikholwa ukuthi anizange nibakhuthalele, ukuthi aninikelanga ngemizamo yenu yonke. Kodwa Kimi, benilokhu nidebesela futhi nibudedengu, Mina ningigcina kuphela ezinkumbulweni kodwa hhayi njalo njalo ezinhliziyweni zenu. Ukuzinikela Kwami kanye nemizamo Yami ihlala njalo ingazwakali kini, futhi anikaze nizame ukuqonda. Nimane niba nokucabangisisa kwesikhashana bese niyakholwa ukuthi kuzo kwanela. Le ndlela “yokwethembeka” akusiyona lena ebengiyilangazelela, kodwa yileyo okukade yaba isinengiso Kimi. Nokho, nakuba ngikusho lokhu, nizoqhubeka nokuvuma kuphela into eyodwa noma ezimbili kodwa futhi ningakwazi ukuyamukela ngokuphelele, ngoba nonke niyazethemba kakhulu, futhi nihlala njalo nikhetha lokhu enifuna ukukwamukela emazwini Mina engiwakhulumile. Uma nisengale ndlela, Mina nginazo izindlela ezigodliwe zokulwa nokuzethemba kwenu, futhi Mina ngizokwenza ukuthi nivume ukuthi wonke amazwi Ami ayiqiniso futhi awasiyo inhlanekezelo yeqiniso.
     Uma Mina bengingabeka ingcebo ethile phambi kwenu manje bese nginicela ukuba nikhethe ngokukhululeka, nazi ukuthi[a] Mina ngeke nginahlulele, abaningi bangakhetha ingcebo bese belahla iqiniso. Abangcono kini bangayeka ingcebo bese bekhetha iqiniso ngokungabaza, ngaleso sikhathi labo abaphakathi nendawo bayothatha ingcebo ngesinye isandla neqiniso ngakwesinye. Ngale ndlela, ngeke yini ubuwena bangempela bube sobala? Uma nikhetha phakathi kweqiniso kanye nanoma yini enithembeke kuyo, nonke niyokwenza isinqumo esinjalo, futhi nesimo sengqondo yenu singaguquki. Ingabe akunjalo? Ingabe ababaningi yini phakathi kwenu abaguquguquka phakathi kokulungile nokungalungile? Emncintiswaneni phakathi kokuhle nokubi, okumnyama nokumhlophe, ngokuqinisekile niyazazi izinqumo enazenza phakathi komndeni noNkulunkulu, izingane noNkulunkulu, ukuthula nokuthikamezeka, ingcebo nobumpofu, ubukhulu nokuba umuntukazana, ukwesekwa nokudelwa, kanye nokunye. Phakathi komndeni onokuthula kanye nonomsindo, nakhetha okokuqala, futhi ngaphandle kokungabaza; phakathi kwengcebo kanye nomsebenzi, naphinde futhi nakhetha okokuqala, naze nalahlekelwa nayintando yokubuyela ogwini;[b] phakathi komnotho nobumpofu, nakhetha okokuqala; phakathi kwamadodana, amadodakazi, amakhosikazi, abayeni, kanye Nami, nakhetha okokuqala; futhi phakathi kombono neqiniso, naphinda futhi nakhetha okokuqala. Ngibhekene nalo lonke uhlobo lwezenzo zenu ezimbi, ngokusobala sengilahlekelwe ukwethembela Kwami kini. Mina ngishaqeke kakhulu ukuthi izinhliziyo zenu zinqaba kakhulu ukuthi zithanjiswe. Iminyaka eminingi yokuzinikela kanye nokuzama kungilethele ngokusobala ukudela kanye nokuphelelwa yithemba kwenu Kimi. Kepha amathemba Ami ngani ayakhula ngosuku ngalunye oludlulayo, ngokuba usuku Lwami selubekiwe ngokupheleleyo phambi kwawo wonke umuntu. Nokho-ke, niyaqhubeka nokufuna lokho okungokwasebumnyameni kanye nasebubini, futhi niyenqaba ukuxegisa lokhu enibambelele kukho. Ngokunjalo, uyoba yini umphumela wakho? Ingabe uke wakucabangisisa lokhu ngaphambili? Uma ubungacelwa ukuba ukhethe futhi, ingabe ungama kuphi? Kungaba ilokhu kwakuqala namanje? Lokhu eninganginika khona Mina kungaba ukuphoxeka kanye nosizi lokudabuka? Ingabe izinhliziyo zenu ziyoqhubeka ukuba zibe yimfudumalo encinyane? Ingabe usazoqhubeka nokungazi ukuthi kumele wenzeni ukuze ududuze inhliziyo Yami? Kulo mzuzu, siyini isinqumo sakho? Ingabe uzothobela amazwi Ami noma uzokhathala yiwo? Usuku Lwami selumisiwe phambi kwamehlo akho, futhi lokhu obhekene nakho impilo entsha kanye nesiqalo esisha. Nokho-ke, kufanele ngikutshele ukuthi lesi siqalo asisikho ukuqala komsebenzi omdala kabusha, kodwa ukuvalwa komdala. Okusho ukuthi, lesi isenzo sokugcina. Mina ngikholwa ukuthi nizoqonda ukuthi yini engajwayelekile ngalesi siqalo. Kodwa ngolunye usuku ngokushesha, niyoqonda incazelo yeqiniso yalesi siqalo, ngakho asihambisane ndawonye sisidlule futhi singenise isiphetho esilandelayo! Nokho-ke, engiqhubeka nokungakhululeki ngakho ukuthi uma ubhekene nokungalungi kanye nobulungiswa, njalo ukhetha lokhu kokuqala. Kodwa konke lokhu sekudlulile. Mina ngithemba ukuthi ngizokhipha emqondweni Wami lokhu okwenzeke kuwe ngaphambili, ngikukhiphe ngakunye ngakunye, noma lokhu kunzima kakhulu ukukwenza. Kepha Mina nginezindlela ezinhle zokukufeza lokhu. Akuthi ikusasa lithathe indawo yokwakudala futhi livumele izithunzi zosekudlulile kwakho zixoshwe kube nokushintshelana ngobuwena bakho beqiniso banamuhla. Lokhu kusho ukuthi kuzomele ngikuhluphe ukuze uphinde wenze isinqumo futhi bese uyabona ukuthi wethembeke kubani.
       Imibhalo yaphansi: 

      a. Umbhalo omdala ukhipha “ukwazi lokho.” 

       b. Buyela ogwini: isaga sase Shayina, esichaza “ukuphenduka komunye

Awekho amazwana:

Thumela amazwana